Boundless Creativity + time to burn= Fun!!!

Its the month of October and because they scraped off another reason to drink, A.K.A. public holidays, lets create our own excuses. Surfing through the internet reveals that when people have time on their hands, anything they come up with seem perfectly logical to them. So below I have a list of some of the most peculiar competitions and sports that are around. Maybe one day after the usual dose of time on twitter and pubs, we might make an allowance to indulge in some few atrocities too.

1. Wife carrying competition

   

If this was done here in Kenya, some people would pay good money just to watch their friends attempt to carry their wives. it is not a secret that the wedding ring in Kenya seems to inject automatic baking powder into married women and they balloon up to sizes that even they didn’t know they could reach. The objective of game is usually to carry your wife all the way through an obstacle course and the first man to cross the finish line with his wife, wins beer the equivalent of his wife’s weight. Pretty cool and hilarious right?

2. Midget throwing Contest

This cracked me up. Who does that? Apparently, this game is in Australia and it was almost banned because it degrades the dwarfs. But people argued that it denies the midgets a chance to make extra income! Really. Its like tossing kids with a heightened(pun intended)sense of humor. It just looks wrong  just by the sheer size of them. It is a bar attraction in which dwarves wearing special padded clothing or Velcro costumes are thrown onto mattresses or at Velcro-coated walls, participants of the contest compete to throw the dwarf the farthest.

If introduced, can this game really fly in Kenya?

3. Extreme Ironing World Championships

Have you heard of mascularization of house chores? Well, you’ve heard it now. These men are going to extreme measures just to get some chores done. I bet their wives have never asked them to iron clothes again after these stunts. It is outrageous to ask your husband to iron clothes then he goes underwater and comes back with the clothes unironed and wet to boot because he couldn’t find a socket!!? I bet this sport was invented by a husband with a twisted sense of humor.

It started in Leicester, UK in 1997, and is an exciting and dangerous sport where anyone who would like to participate should be ready for ironing a few items of laundry, preferably on a difficult climb of a mountainside, ice or under water.

4. World Sauna Championships

When you hear sauna, you immediately think of relaxation and bliss. But imagine sitting in there for an infinite amount of time until you feel that you cannot take it any more and  your behind is on fire. Well, welcome to the world of sauna champs.

Competitors from over 20 countries take part in the competition at their own risk, an

d have to sign a form agreeing not to take legal action on the organization. The competitors must sit in a 110° sauna and half a liter of water is added every 30 seconds. They must sit erect with their thighs and buttocks on the seat. They cannot touch any surface with their hands and forearms have to be in an upright position and must stay on their knees. The person who sits longest is the winner.

Disclaimer: Someone once died in this game so I wouldn’t recommend it!!!

 

5.Kenyan Flavor

Well, just for good measure, I throw in some local flavor. I bet the Kenyan Bull fighting and cock fighting would rank highly in bizzarness.  Not forgetting donkey derby in Lamu at the Lamu culture fest. That is the home of pampered donkeys.

From the list, its clear that traditionalists where not entirely primitive and boring. They did have their own version of fun! Join in the cheer!!

More than a beer- getting creative with beer!

Its a staple in many refrigerators. Beer is well loved as a chilling out companion and a partying basic need. Well, here are some more interesting ways to use your favorite brand of beer besides drinking it. Creativity, knows no bounds in this crazy world….

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1. Bathe in It

Instead of sipping a beer, try soaking in it. Pour a bottle of your favorite beer in the tub and lie back for a real bubble bath.

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2. Put Out a Fire

Although certainly not as effective as a real fire extinguisher, a can or bottle of beer can mimic one if none is available. Simply shake and spritz. After all, beer is mostly water. This works on small grill flare-ups, and some people have been known to carry an emergency can in their car in case of engine fire. Or at least that’s what they tell the state troopers.

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3. Marinate Meat

Beer is slightly acidic—and that makes it an excellent meat tenderizer. This allows you to enjoy leaner cuts that otherwise might be too tough. Beer also won’t alter the meat’s flavor as much as wine- and vinegar-based marinades do. Poke a few holes in the meat, put it in a Tupperware container or a large resealable bag, and add beer. (English ale is great for beef.) Marinate in the refrigerator for a few hours or, better yet, overnight. Do not drink the marinade.

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4. Polish Pots

In days of yore, the last bit of beer from spent kegs was collected and used to polish the copper vats in breweries. Gregg Smith, general manager of the Idaho Brewing Company, is keeping the tradition alive by using beer to put a shine on the copper-top tables in his Idaho Falls establishment. “Because of its acidity,” he explains, “you can just pour some on, let it sit for a while, then wipe it off. It also works well on Revere Ware pots.”

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5. Make Beer Barbecue Sauce

Ingredients:
1 medium Spanish onion, diced
1 medium banana pepper, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 Tbsp capers
5 ripe tomatoes, diced
1 small can tomato paste
1/3 cup each wine vinegar, olive oil, soy sauce, brown sugar
1 Tbsp balsamic vinegar
2 Tbsp each Worcestershire sauce, Tabasco, honey, Dijon mustard, horseradish, oregano
2 Tbsp fresh ground pepper
1 tsp cumin
Dash of ground clove
12 ounces amber ale or porter

Combine all ingredients in a large saucepan and boil for 10 minutes. Lower heat and simmer about 4 hours until thickened. Cool and refrigerate for 24 hours so the flavors can meld. Then baste everything but the dog with it.

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6. Shampoo Hair

Not only is beer the remedy for a dull party, it’s also the cure for dull hair. Dump a cup into a small saucepan and bring it to a boil over medium heat. Let it reduce until there’s 1/4 cup left. This removes the alcohol, which can dry hair. Let the beer cool, then mix it with a cup of your favorite shampoo. Pour it into an empty shampoo bottle, then wash and rinse as usual. It’ll give your hair more shine and luster.

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7. Loosen Rusty Bolts

Pour some beer on them and wait a few minutes. The carbonation may help break up the rust.

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8. Clear Up Brown Spots in Your Lawn

The fermented sugars in beer stimulate plant growth and kill fungi. He recommends spraying either home brew or Rolling Rock (both are chemical-free) on those annoying brown spots in your lawn. (Either that, or just stop peeing there.) “The grass will absorb the sugar in the beer and draw energy from it.

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9. Steam Clams or Mussels

Fill a large steamer pot with equal parts water and beer, then bring to a boil. Steam the randy little mollusks until their shells open. Couldn’t be simpler. The beer imparts a nice flavor.

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10. Pass a Kidney Stone

As you’ve undoubtedly noticed, beer is a diuretic. It helps flush the kidneys and bladder. This can be beneficial if you’re suffering from a bladder infection or kidney stone. “You can drink water or cranberry juice, but beer also works,” says Larry L. Alexander, M.D., medical director of Central Florida Regional Hospital’s emergency department. ” It helps dilate the ureters [the tubes connecting the kidneys and bladder], which may help you pass a stone quicker and easier. Plus, the alcohol will take the edge off the pain.” But don’t drink beer if you’re taking antibiotics or narcotic pain medications. You’ll render the drugs useless and make yourself sick.

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11. Boil Shrimp

Open three 12-ounce bottles of Yuengling Premium or a comparable mild pilsner and pour them into a large soup pot. Wait for the beer to go flat (about 2 hours), then add 1/4 cup Old Bay Seasoning and 2 tsp ground turmeric (to turn the shrimp a rich yellow). Bring to a boil over medium-high heat, then cook for 5 minutes.

Meanwhile, rinse 2 pounds of extra-large raw shrimp in cold water and drain. Add them to the pot and stir. Cover and cook for 5 minutes, no more. Quickly remove the shrimp using a large slotted spoon. Serve immediately with cocktail sauce and, you guessed it, more beer. This same recipe makes great lobster, but cook it for 12 to 15 minutes.

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12. Kill Slugs

Gather a few empty salsa jars (or similar wide-mouth containers) and fill them a third of the way with cheap beer. Then bury them about 15 feet from your garden, girlfriend, or whatever you’re trying to protect. Make sure the rims are almost level with the soil surface. For some reason, slugs love beer. They’ll find the traps, drop in, and drown. Do this in the evening, let them party all night, and give them an honorable burial in the mor

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13. Soothe Tired Feet

Pour a couple of cold ones into a bucket and soak your dogs. “Ice-cold beer with lots of carbonation can be soothing for tired feet,” Dr. Alexander says. Stop at two; you don’t want to start staggering!

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14. Lower Your Blood Pressure

John Palmer, a hypertensive home-brewer and engineer in Monrovia, California, puts a handful of dried hops or hops pellets (available at any home-brew store) in a coffeemaker and brews them with hot water. It makes for a bitter tea, but he claims it brings his blood pressure back to normal within 10 minutes by dilating the capillaries. “There may be something to it,” Dr. Alexander says. “A person who’s intoxicated is usually flushed and sweaty. Some ingredient is dilating the blood vessels, which, in turn, lowers blood pressure.” We don’t advocate this as a replacement for medication, though.

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15. Trick a Cheap Landlord

Live in an apartment where the landlord pays the heat bill and sets the thermostat pretty low? Ice up a can of beer in the freezer, then set it atop the lockbox that encloses the thermostat. The cold from the beer will trick the thermostat into thinking the temperature has dropped so it’ll turn the heat on.

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16. Bake Beer Bread

You already know how to put a bun in the oven. Now it’s time to go all the way. Here’s a healthful, foolproof recipe for high-fiber beer bread from the book Tailoring Your Tastes, by nutritionist Omichinski:

Ingredients:
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 Tbsp sugar
2 Tbsp baking powder
1/4 cup ground flaxseed
1 tsp each salt, dried basil, dried rosemary, thyme
1/2 cup unsalted sunflower seeds
1 Tbsp cooking oil
12 oz beer, at room temperature

Mix all the dry ingredients. Add oil and beer. Stir until dough is just mixed. Put dough in a greased 9x5x3-inch loaf pan. Bake at 375 F for 45 minutes or until nicely browned. Remove from oven and let bread cool in pan for 10 minutes. Remove from pan to cool some more.

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17. Catch Mice

Slugs aren’t the only pests with a fatal attraction to beer. According to Neil Herbst, owner of the Alley Kat Brewing Company in Edmonton, Alberta, you can also trap mice with it. He recommends setting out a few small pails or bowls of beer (his competitors’, never his own), with a small ramp leading up to the lip. The mice will be attracted by the smell, hop in, drink their fill, then be unable to climb out. But if you have alcoholic and fit mice, too bad.

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18. Cure Insomnia

Gregg Smith, author of The Beer Drinker’s Bible, says women often show up at his brewery asking to buy not his beer but the hops he uses to brew it. “They sew it into pillows,” he explains. “The smell of it is supposed to be a sleep aid, especially for colicky babies. I’ve never tried it, but we get enough requests that there must be something to it.” Hops is a type of flower, though, so be careful if you have allergies.

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19. Massage Yourself

A full can of beer is a great self-massage tool, according to Dori Love-Bentley, a certified massage therapist. For instance, take off your shoes and roll a can underfoot. Or put one in the crook of your back or between your shoulder blades and lean back against a wall, rolling it around as you do so. It works just about anywhere—quads, glutes, neck, calves. “The pressure loosens up muscle tissue,” Love-Bentley explains, “and encourages bloodflow to the area.”

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20. Calm an Upset Stomach

Sipping on a highly carbonated beer can settle a stomach just like 7Up or Sprite can. Plus, the alcohol helps buffer pain. “I’ve never seen a true medical study supporting this,” Dr. Alexander says, “but I have patients tell me it works. The only time you have to be careful is if you have an ulcer or gastritis. Alcohol can inflame that.”

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21. Cook Rice

Rinse 1 cup jasmine rice in water. Do it twice more, then drain well. Next, dump the rice into a medium-size pot and add 12 ounces of beer. (A nut-brown ale works well.) Bring the mixture to a boil, turn the heat to low, and cover the pot. Simmer for 20 minutes, then remove from the stove and cool for an additional 10 minutes. The rice won’t be lumpy, and it’ll have a nuttier flavor—just like you after you eat it.

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22. Stop Snoring

If your log-sawing is ripping a hole in your marriage, try this simple remedy: Get a pocket T-shirt and a 6-ounce mini-can of beer. Put the can in the pocket and fasten it closed with a safety pin. Just before you go to bed, put the shirt on backward. Research shows that you’re more likely to snore when resting on your back. This little setup prevents you from rolling over. Plus, come morning, you won’t have to get out of bed for breakfast.

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23. Roast Chicken

To make “Swampman Dan’s Drunken Chicken,” buy a few medium-size whole birds and a six-pack of beer. Drink half a can of beer, cut off the top third of the can, and add 1 tsp salt, 1 tsp pepper, 1 tsp Worcestershire sauce, 2 Tbsp liquid crab boil, and 1 tsp creole seasoning.

Then shove the can into the chicken and place it in a secure, standing position on the grill. As the brew boils, it’ll intoxicate the bird with flavor. Takes about 1 hour.

Recipe compliments of Swamp Cookin’ with the River People

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24. Ice a Hamstring

Frozen or very cold cans of beer make great ice packs. Hold one against whatever is ailing you—a sore muscle, a sunburned neck, a pounding headache. With an Ace bandage, you can even wrap a frosty 16-ouncer against the back of your thigh. Or use a sweatband to strap a can near your elbow after a tennis match. “A metal can will transmit the cold very rapidly,” Dr. Alexander says. Just make sure to put some thin fabric between the skin and the beer can to avoid frostbite.